Axum is doing very well.  Our first picture of him was when he was one week old.  He was tiny and dehydrated from a long journey from the north and a lack of food.  Nate and I stood over his crib tonight and watched him sleep peacefully.  We noticed how big he looked (he is now eight months old).  The biggest change for him these past few weeks is that he got a helmet.  His head is asymmetrical from laying down on one side in the orphanage.  We hate having to put it on him but felt like it was the best thing to do in the long run.  We hope he adjusts to it quickly and that we see results soon.  Today we noticed one of his top teeth came through.  That’s #3!  It is so exciting to see him grow but bittersweet at the same time.  I remember months going by as he was in the orphanage and knowing that I was missing out on those first 5-6 months of his life.  I would have given anything to hold him and enjoy him as an infant.  But overall I am grateful he is growing and doing so well.  Here’s a picture of Axum with his helmet (yes, we chose the hardcore skull and crossbones).

Abriha and Axum share a strong bond.  When Abriha comes in the room, Axum’s eyes light up and he gets a huge smile on his face.  Abriha loves interacting with Axum.  She is always giving him hugs and kisses.  Nobody can make Axum laugh as hard as Abriha can.  It is so entertaining to watch her perform for him and hear him laugh.  These past few weeks she has wanted to hold him and feed him a bottle.  She holds out her little arms and says “come on! (AKA “let me hold him!)”

I don’t want to paint an unrealistic picture of life with the kids.  We have some crazy moments that all parents experience.  You know, the fun things like getting peed on, having our hair pulled, working through toddler tantrums, etc.

Little Axum was content to look at the lights and watch us hang the ornaments.

Here is the finished product.

We woke up at 6:30, showered, and ate breakfast.  At 8:30 our driver Danny picked us up.  It was rush hour, so the traffic was crazy.  We arrived at the courthouse at 9:15.  We had a representative with us who carried all our documentation.   We walked in a small room that was filled with people (Ethiopians and foreigners).  There were 30 seats around the perimeter of the room and all were taken.  The center of the room was full of people, so we went to a place that had an opening.  There was another couple there so we started talking to them.  We found out they were from Wyoming and were adopting a little girl from another agency.  We enjoyed getting to know them.

One by one, people got called in to the judge’s office and the room thinned out until it was only us and about four European families.  We waited in that room for about two hours.  We found out that our files were missing, so somebody had to go find them.  Somebody finally came in with a stack of files and a few minutes later the court worker opened the door and called “Bethzatha”.  That meant us, though we weren’t sure why our cased was called Bethzatha.  Our kids never spent time there, although others kids from Hannah’s Hope do.

So we went in the judge’s office and took a seat.  She spoke English and asked us questions like, “Since you started the process, have you learned about Ethiopia?”, “Are you prepared to deal with the identity issues your children will have?”, “Are these your first children?”, “Do you know other adoptive families that you can meet with?”  Then she told us that once this is finalized, we cannot change our minds.  We told her we understood.  Then she said the words we were hoping to hear: “Your file is complete. They are yours”.  We were SO happy to hear those words!!!  I thanked her and felt a rush of emotions.  It was one of the happiest moments knowing A and T are officially our children.

After court, Danny took us to an Italian restaurant and then shopping at an outdoor market.  We then returned to Hannah’s Hope, where we spent another couple hours with the kids.  When we got there, the toddlers were in a room with the special mothers.  A ran out to hug us.  She was wearing a ring and necklace that we gave her.  We went over to the swings and Nate went to get T in the baby house.  I held A in my lap and told her that we are now a family.  I knew she didn’t understand me but it was surreal to tell her and to think that she and T are officially part of our family.

After Nate got T we took turns holding him and getting him to interact with us.  He started talking a lot and we took a little video of him.  Once in awhile we would hold him up to get him to make eye contact with us and smile.  We are in LOVE with his smile!!!  He is such a happy and good baby.

A was fascinated with the buttons on my sweater.  I watched as she carefully buttoned each one of them.  I was glad to see she had good fine motor skills and a good attention span.  She would notice when an airplane would go by and point to it.  She would say “ah-roh-PLAHN!” in Amharic and get excited.  Nate and I were happy to know that she loves airplanes.  Hopefully her enthusiasm continues through our long flight to the US!

Right before we left, A was acting very cute towards Nate.  She had her arms around his neck and gave him a kiss before a special mother took her away with the other kids.  Then we went up to the baby room and handed T to his special mother.

Shortly after we met A, another special mother brought out T.  He was so much bigger than the pictures!  That made us happy to see that he was growing well.  The special mother handed him right to Nate.  He has a hard time making eye contact too, but when he does, he gives us a big smile.  He started babbling and making soft screeches and he seemed to like us.

We then had an orientation with Tsigie about our I-600 forms and a few other random items.  It was a little hard concentrating as we held T and watched A run around the office with her my little ponies.

After that we were able to just play with the kids for a couple of hours. We went upstairs to a little area outside A’s room and got out some toys.  A was really excited to show us her bed.  She started to open up as she played with us.  She loved to scoot around on a little box that had spinning blocks on it.  At the same time, we were able to feed T for the first time, and he went to sleep for us. He was a sweet baby.

When it was lunchtime, we went into the lunch room and watched A and a bunch of other kids eat.  She loved her beef and injera, and she even let me help her eat.  Nate helped her wash her hands when she was done.

Shortly before we left, we went over to the swings because we knew A loves the swings.  We sat her on our laps and the swung for a little while.  By that time she made a bit more eye contact, and she gradually let me get closer to giving her a kiss. It was very cute.

After that it was time to go after one last time seeing T and seeing A get ready for her nap. She waved goodbye to us and we had to leave.  It was a bit disappointing only being able to spend two hours with them, but we’ll be back tomorrow for some more time.

Tonight we had dinner at a place called Yod Abyssinia. They called it the “cultural dinner” because we had Ethiopian food and we watched a neat singing and dancing program.  The food was similar to what we get at the Ethiopian restaurant in Salt Lake, but this one was better.  It was a big plate of injera and a few different meats and sauces.  The restaurant was packed with younger Ethiopians and quite a few Chinese people.  It must be one of the good places in the city to go eat.

As we started eating, the band sat up on stage and started playing music.  We got some video of it.  The dancers came out next and the one that really attracted our attention was one with a few drums and a lot of shoulder and head movements.  Wass told us it was a dance from Tigray, so naturally we were more interested because that’s where our kids are from.  The Ethiopian culture is so beautiful.  It is a blessing that our kids come from a rich heritage.  They can be so proud to be Ethiopian.  We hope to help them appreciate and keep their Ethiopian identities.

After the dinner we were taken back to our hotel where we emailed pictures to family and friends.

Well, it’s time for bed and we are anxious for another exciting day with A and T.

Here are some pictures of adorable presents for A and T:

We were overwhelmed before, during and after the shower with gratitude for such supportive family and friends who will love A and T so much.  Thank you Blair ladies for the AWESOME shower and thanks to everyone who showed up to celebrate with us.

This past week baby “T” turned three months old!  Although he is still small, he has grown and changed so much since our first photos of him.  We are grateful to have a photo of him when he was one week old.  Our most recent photos were taken just a few weeks ago.

We are very grateful to all the families who have sent us pictures of our kids.  We also appreciate the George family who videotaped “T” when they were there visiting their daughter “S”.  Thursday night we watched those videos of him.  Oh my goodness, we are sooooo in love!!!  We think he is absolutely perfect.  We feel even more blessed to be his parents!

We found out Friday that “T” has conjunctivitis (pink eye).  The orphanage takes very good care of him and is giving him eye drops.  Even though it is hard to be so far away from “T” we are grateful he is in the good hands of his special mothers who take care of him.

]]> http://www.therealblairfamily.com/presents-for-a-and-t/feed 0 http://www.therealblairfamily.com/referral-day http://www.therealblairfamily.com/referral-day#comments Thu, 30 Jun 2011 03:02:16 +0000 April http://www.therealblairfamily.com/?p=442

After a wait that sometimes seemed too much to bear, we finally got the referral call yesterday. We had been hearing of referrals in the week leading up to the call, but I still didn’t believe that we’d be hearing from our agency until sometime in July. I thought the end of July was most likely. So when I went into work yesterday, my thoughts were that we could get a call at anytime, but I wasn’t counting on it. Yet for some reason, I decided to keep my phone on me instead of removing it from my pocket like I do every day. A sign, you ask? Who knows, but it was interesting that it happened that way.

April called at at 12:47 p.m. to announce that our case worker just called. I knew it was THE announcement just by the way April said my name; she sounded giddy and I immediately became so as well. She told me that she had news about TWO little ones, just as we had hardly dared to hope! We were almost to the point where we had talked ourselves into being happy with a single referral (okay, I had a much easier time at this than April), so we were both shocked that we had received exactly what we wanted so badly. A three year old girl and an infant boy.

I walked back to my desk, trying to contain my excitement. I quickly collected my things, hurried home and started to clean the house. I know, I know. But we wanted to get the video of us on the phone with our case worker, opening our referral email, and we didn’t want a pig sty for posterity. So I cleaned as my hands shook. My mind wasn’t on the cleaning. I was just waiting for April to get home so we could get on the phone and see our kids! She finally pulled up and came upstairs to help with the finishing cleaning touches. We set up the video camera, opened the laptop and prepared for what would be the most important phone call of our lives to this point.

We called our case worker and she didn’t answer! I think we only waited about another two minutes before we tried again, and this time we got her. She told us to open the email she had just sent, so with shaking hands we opened it and laid eyes for the first time ever on our kids! They are just adorable. I think we both fell in love immediately and knew that we could not think of anything but accepting the referral and getting on with the process.

We then listened as our case worker went into what they knew so far about the two children. That was the hard part. Looking at the picture of this little toddler and her younger brother and hearing what they’d gone through was absolutely heartbreaking. For a moment I felt ashamed at feeling so much joy at a time when she is going through so much pain. I started thinking how I wanted so badly for these kids to have their mom back, yet there I sat, wanting to be happy that we were finally going to get our kids. It was bittersweet. I don’t know how else to describe it. Across the world in the Horn of Africa, a family experienced pain and loss. We got two children. It just doesn’t seem fair, but then, these two kids need a family now.

After we were finished with the call, we called our families and invited them over to share in the good news and look at pictures. Everybody packed into our one bedroom apartment and we had a fun evening of talking and anticipating what our kids will be like. It’s exciting to start thinking about names, showers, getting ready and all that fun stuff. As first time parents, this is all new to us and it’s for sure going to be a crazy ride. We couldn’t be happier about it.

When everybody went home, we wanted to get all of our paperwork done and out the door as soon as possible. April stayed up until 2:45 working on it! I tried, but I only made it to 12:30 or so. But I did help with more of it this morning, so I can’t be counted as a slacker. We got it all done and sent off just a few short hours ago.

And now………we wait some more. And I have a feeling the wait is going to be more difficult now that we have pictures to look at every day.

Nate and I have been keeping busy.  Here’s some of our excitement:

• Last month we celebrated our 7 year wedding anniversary!!!  I made Nate dinner that night.  I am a very lucky girl to have married Nate.  He still treats me like a princess.  I look forward to our relationship once we have kids.  Our lives are pretty relaxed and quiet now but I know we are in for some serious changes!

• We’ve met some great people who are also adopting from Ethiopia.  Danielle is on the AGCI wait list.  She is in the low teens for a girl but could get a referral at any time because her age parameters are 0-30 months.  Kylie is about to submit her dossier and go on a wait list.  It looks like her agency’s wait is not as long.  We could be bringing home boys at around the same time!
• We went to an orphanage fundraiser last weekend which was organized by a family who is adopting a girl from Ethiopia (Kristina and Brian).  They traveled in January to appear in court and met her (she is beautiful).  They are waiting to pass court and for an embassy date.  Then they’ll get to travel again – this time to pick up their sweet girl.  We are so glad to meet people in our same situation.  It’s amazing how close I feel to them.  There is such a strong bond among adoptive parents.  Nate and I want our kid(s) to be exposed to Ethiopian culture and other adopted kids.  We’re glad to be building a network now.
• Nate got Lasik a few weeks ago.  He is so happy to be free of glasses and contacts.  His right eye is red still, but his vision is great.
• Nate got a promotion today!  He is now an SEO Manager.  Congrats Mister!  We celebrated tonight by going out for sushi.  MMMM.

So what now?  I will mail out the documents tomorrow.  AGCI will then send us a binder with pre-adoption information and the DOSSIER.  I have been anxious to get my hands on that for a long time.  The average amount of time for people to complete the dossier is 2-3 months.  After the dossier is submitted to Ethiopia, we will go on the wait list and should expect to wait 3-6 months until we receive a referral (where we are matched with a child).  It will then take another 2-4 months for the government to ensure that the child is an orphan and to process the adoption.  After that, we will travel to Ethiopia to pick up our baby.  If you haven’t done the math, we have 7 – 13 months to go.  Hopefully it will feel like I’m moving faster soon!